Slashes of bitching and moaning…

Oh its monday. It hasnt been a terrible monday considering i had to be at a meeting an hour away from my house at 8am. I spent the larger part of the day with Madame Fabu doing what cannot be described any other way than “getting my shit together”. It was a lot of fun as my boss Lonnie Manko was there and she tends to add to the hilarity (everytime we get yelled at as a group by other depts. for laughing too loud, Lonnie Manko is right in the middle of it. I love that about her)

– I lost ANOTHER DAMN bank card. I actually lost it a week ago and finally admitted it to myself today.

-Gill is in the process of a significantly pricey root canal. He started it friday and finishes tomorrow. They didnt ask him if he wanted a root canal. They just gave it to him. So I must confess dear readers, we are planning to pull the dental equivalent of a dine and dash. (ive coached him extensively on exactly what to say to not raise suspicion) Actually we will pay but not the hundred and forty eight dollars a month they want. Maybe 40 bucks a month. Maybe not. Here’s a little lesson about informed consent mo-foes. And you just lost three dental customers.

– Im all for buying your halloween candy early and often. However, if you are going to do this, dont buy it three freaking months early because we are going to notice how freaking stale it actually is. Also? Dont freeze it in your nasty ice caked freezer. And dont store it next to bananas. Because let me tell you, you might think you are doing something funky with a banana flavored snickers, but banana flavored whoppers are nauseating and make me want to smash your pumpkins. Or your mailbox. Or your windows.

-Also on the halloween front, if you are past puberty and going trick or treating, please put a little more effort in your costume than throwing on a football jersey and saying you are a football player or a plaid shirt and saying you are a lumberjack. Because when you do that, I want to throw a used tissue in your bag and say its a candy bar.

– I think one of my patients actually faked a seizure for attention this weekend. I cant tell anyone on the case because I have no evidence. I do have suspicions though. Lots and lots of suspicions.

– I REALLY need to stop making meals out of candy. But i cannot substitute this by having three real meals and three candy meals like i did today. The madness somehow must end.

– My little e at the bottom of the screen that allows me to launch explorer is gone. I need that little e. My functioning is clearly impaired without it.

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5 Responses to Slashes of bitching and moaning…

  1. Canada says:

    I must say I can identify with the Hallowe’en candy (not so much the banana issue, though). I am going to the gym, trying to eat sensibly, and then Hallowe’e’n, the first of the chocolate holidays, arrives. Followed not too distantly by Christmas (which also includes baking, hor d’oeurves, and much eggnog and other celebratory beverage drinking), then Valentines, and concludes with Easter. The sugar headache is pissing me off, but I can’t seem to stop my self, and I swear my pants are tighter already!

    Here’s hoping that Tuesday is better than Monday (which, you have to admit, was WAY better than your Sunday)

  2. Pippajo says:

    Okay, so we had a similar experience with the dentist. The Viking needed ANOTHER root canal, which we knew. But what we DIDN’T know until at least 4 months after the fact, was that he had exceeded his $1000 allowance for the year and would then be billed for the procedure. We got a call from the new girl in the office a few weeks ago saying, “I’m sorry. We screwed up, but you owe us almost $2000.” Turns out they FINALLY got the hint that the woman in the office was SENILE, let her go and realized everything she had screwed up. She would call us to remind us of appointments we never made, or give us the wrong time or date, or get us mixed up. Once she tried to take me back into the exam room when a)she had another female patient’s file and b) it was My Boy’s appointment. This is the same dentist’s office that took such crappy x-rays that she missed two cavities in My Boy’s mouth and by the time I took him to a pediatric dentist he had to have them pulled! I’d look for a new one, but she’s the only one I trust not to hurt me.

    Also, The Viking was messing with the computer last night and he changed some things. Nothing looks like it used to and it took me forever to figure out how to get online today. I’m all thrown off! I hate that! I still have my little e, but all kinds of strange windows pop up now, asking me all kinds of questions I just don’t think I’m ready to answer! This might be his passive-aggressive way of telling me YOU SPEND TOO MUCH TIME ON THAT DAMN COMPUTER, WOMAN!

  3. L.L. Barkat says:

    Well, if it’s snickers, that’s protein at least. 🙂

  4. Anonymous says:

    I might recommend the dental dine & dash to GB, who might be needing a root canal soon too…

    (lb, of course)

  5. lola says:

    I cannot stop laughing-well, long enough to drop you a note. Laughed three separate times when reading about making meals out of candy!!!!! Made my damp day!
    Thanks
    Lola aka friend of Canada

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