Six degrees of anxiety binding


I have a work friend who for the sake of the blog we will call Spike. He shares an office with Madame Fabu which greatly delights me. I will not expound upon the many great qualities of Spike because he has been here to visit before and i dont want him to think im sucking up but suffice it to say, Spike is really good people.

Anyway, as my dear readers (both real life and bloggy) know, Im currently in the throes of an insomnia cycle. This will come into play later.

It all began when i went to meet madame fabu on wednesday to complete some assignments (that she has been OH SO PATIENTLY waiting for me to do and yes i am sucking up because she EARNED that as you will see). I cant remember how the conversation with Spike started but i can tell you that somehow during the course of that conversation a completely useless and maddening obsession took root….within five minutes, I was completely sucked in. Ok are you ready? Its the kevin bacon game. Now im guessing most of you know the kevin bacon game where all actors and actresses can be linked to kevin bacon in less than six connections? its been around for years and i admit my idiot savant tendencies allowed me to have some fun with it in the mid nineties. Somehow, and i truly have no idea how, in the midst of my completely overwhelmed end of the month panic mode, something in my brain decided it needed to completely glom onto this concept.

Spike and I spent the better part of the early evening annoying the crap out of fellow co-workers (madame fabu was surprisingly patient even though she really doesnt get it since she chooses to fill her brain with silly things like attention to pertinent details and clinical skills)(Besides at some point i need to blog about her own little mental hell which will not only be extremely entertaining but also will allow my readers to see that she has very few stones to throw hehehe)trying to meet any and all challenges we could imagine or elicit from unsuspecting passersby. Good times right? No big deal. TO be honest, it is perfectly normal for me to waste valuable time on stuff like this forcing myself to stay up and work til all hours in the morning to make up for my own idiocy (Its ok, im dealing with it in therapy) But much to my surprise, next thing I realize its the predawn hours of the following morning and I CANT STOP THINKING ABOUT THE CONNECTIONS!

It kind of clicked that this might have crossed the bounds of distracting spider monkey party games when I was weighing the appropriacy of texting Spike at 345am to tell him i did Jean Claude Van Damme in 4 steps. (weve since established that i will probably do that frequently now and he should not be alarmed) Maybe its the nature of the game offering me some sort of “brain gym” stimulation to help me decompress. Maybe its the extreme prison rules we’ve kind of developed for the game (Lonnie Manko is quite entertained by this and is helping cement the prison rules). All I know is for the past few days, Ive refined these connections in my mind continually, constantly looking for newer shorter ways to make this happen. Spending spare moments perusing the IMDB for new connections (following my own strict standards of research of course. Is that a sign of a schizophrenic break? It seems like it might be but obviously Im not in a position to judge)Desperately grabbing friends and relatives begging them to give me a challenging actor or actress.

Why am I telling you this? to process? to look for some sort of solution? Are you joking? IM LOOKING FOR NEW PEOPLE! I am giving myself two weeks of allowing myself open access to the IMDB just for refreshing purposes (I bore two children, i should be allowed to refresh of course still following the same stringent research standards) and then I plan on being a complete MACHINE about this. UN. STOPPABLE. Ok, Aunt Erthy is here so im going to shower and think about bernadette peters for a while and then share a meal with her!

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13 Responses to Six degrees of anxiety binding

  1. RockDog says:

    Can you connect him to Farrah Fawcett? That would be brilliant.

    Rock ON!

  2. crse says:

    Oh rockdog. Im blushing but must admit, yes i am brilliant.(KIDDING). Just got home from seeing borat and can do it in three steps. Farrah Fawcett was with Helen Hunt in Dr. T and the women. Helen Hunt was in As good as it gets with jack nicholson who was in a “few good men” with…you guessed it brother…kevin bacon.

  3. Jesse says:

    Woah, totally off topic moment: my roommates annoy me.

    On topic, can you connect the big B man with the little P man? P man being Pee-Wee herman. (which is probably really easy).

    I ate bacon 3 times today. Yowza!

  4. crse says:

    Yes my friend, that one is a bit too easy, but I only know this from the 4am shortcut insomnia bout. What id give you today is he was in mystery men with william h. macy who was in murder in the first with….yep….your aforementioned breakfast/anymeal pork product!
    I feel your pain about the roommates. If its any consolation, I have one roommate refuses to communicate and shits all over himself two or three times a day and expects me to clean it up. The kids can be challenging too(HAHAHAHA!) Still i hope it gets better….

  5. RockDog says:

    You kill me! That’s awesome!

  6. luckybuzz says:

    You are freaking amazing. This whole thing kind of freaks me out, but I am nonetheless impressed. 🙂

    And ha! on the roommate situation. 🙂

  7. factor 10 says:

    hmmmm…the great bug-eyed Marty Feldman?

  8. crse says:

    Jen! you rock! AHA Marty feldman
    I actually was waiting for him. I could go the Madaline Kahn way I think i will do peter boyle who was in a lovely little feldman vehicle (and we all know there were not enough of those right?) called In God We Tru$t who who was with a young up and coming feller named Robert Deniro in Taxi Driver. Mr. Deniro then was with our good friend Mr. Bacon in Sleepers…Thank you very much Ill be here all week…

    LB-im a little freaked out by it too. Its like i suddenly realized i had a socially awkward super-power (no wait, thats exactly what it is!) but I knew youd stand by me no matter how awkward it gets (to that I promise no drunk dialling with this). Our love is god baby.

  9. Gill Smoke says:

    Bela Lugosi? Vivien Leigh? Cheating I know.
    David Bowie? He did several movies
    Christopher Lee?
    Shaq? He was in KaZamm or somesuch?
    And since you are on a Judy Garland Kick, get there.

  10. crse says:

    As i just spent a half an hour boring gill with ALL the ways you can connnect these people (except Shaq, for plagaristic purposes) I will offer these last three only on request.

  11. Canada says:

    SHit, you know I am going to be thinking of the links – I was so good at this a few years ago. Okay, 1.Clive Owen 2.Daniel Radcliffe 3.Baryshnikov

  12. crse says:

    Ok sunshine, here we go.
    1)Clive Owen was with Kiera Knightley in King Arthur who was with Laura Linney in Love Actually who was with our boy in Mystic River.
    2)Daniel Radcliffe was with Geoffrey Rush in the Tailor of Panama (a really good movie fyi) who was with William H. Macy in Mystery Men who was with our boy in Murder in the first.
    3) Baryshnikov was with Gene Hackman in Company Business who was with Tom Cruise in the firm who was with our boy in a few good men.
    hmmm all in less than four. I guess my question here would be WHOSE YOUR DADDY???

  13. Anonymous says:

    You rock, sista!!! Now, can you connect ME with Clive Owen? (now THAT would be good – hook me up, you have magical powers, I’m sure of it!)
    -Canada

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