There will be no ketchup in our house until Friday.
It is not appropriate to pin your brother in a corner with the broad side of a broom when you are supposed to be getting dressed for school.
It is also not appropriate to add the phrase “Jews are the Jewiest” to your extrapolation of the noggin song. Especially not in front of your father, who is of Jewish heritage. Or during the intergenerational church service discussing the blending of Christmas and Chanukah celebrations.
Addendum from earlier in the week: If you are trying to convince a life long Christian to join your church, do not absent-mindedly peruse the news letter and make remarks like “Damn, Ill be in the nursery during the “Dancing goats” service”.
Bad guys do indeed have to go to the bathroom like everybody else.
It’s probably not the best idea to say to the football coach on your first day of practice “I want to start with something easy.”
Despite popular household belief, two year olds really don’t need to wear deodorant every morning.
That is all for today. Stay tuned for further announcements.