Thursday Thirteen: The Farewell To Au Pair Edition

The time has come friends. Our boy is packing up and heading across the state tomorrow. Of course we are heartbroken but excited that he is moving ahead on his life’s journey (gill rolls eyes “whatever”. gill is having trouble letting go). We couldn’t let him go without a special TT addressing all the things we will miss about him (posted a day early so he can enjoy it!) Now Im not going to clog this up with boring stuff like he has been the most delightful little house slave we could ever ask for. We want to make this one very Au Pair Unique. So here goes:

1. The way he calls the boys Mr. [Norm] and Mr. [Turnip]. It’s very british and sweet.
2. The way he forgets things you tell him and then believes he has a psychic revelation because he thinks he thought of something you already shared with him when you bring it up.
3. The way he is sad that I don’t like onions or peppers because he can cook so much “good stuff” with these ingredients.
4. The way he makes “offensiveness lists” when he encounters people that offend me. And that he writes them in German, you case of discovery.
5. The way he sends texts in the same manner. But not in German. Because I don’t know German.
6. His incredibly inappropriate sense of humor. Gill and I knew we found a kindred spirit when we tested the boundaries and instead of being confused or appalled, he went right down that road with us.
7. The way he can call either (or both) of us an ass in a way that makes us feel appreciated.
8. The way he is absolutely enchanted with fund-raiser stuff. What 20 year old gives a rat’s ass about fund-raiser stuff? Charming I tell you!
9. The way he will randomly scream out things like “OH MY GOD! WHO BOUGHT KLEENEX?” in the same tone one would use if one looked in the grocery bag and found a severed limb.
10. His fantastically hilarious stories.
11. The way he lets gill talk him into the most ridiculous past times like this mind numbing bandwidth sucker that took up hours of time for both of them
12. The way he finally admitted he is an “iCarly” fan after we busted him watching when the kids were not home.
13. The way that when he commits a blatant faux pas it seldom ends. It just kind of escalates into a series of mortifying but hilarious to watch instances. (Case in point: In the middle of a play last week, he got up climbed over about six people and clattered all the way down the stairs to walk in front of the stage. He didn’t realize there were back steps. He did not get the text telling him there were back steps before he came back. He did wait until the scene change but clattered all the way back up the steps climbed back over the people, sat down and dropped his phone. It was like watching meta-theater)

I don’t really have words to describe how much we are going to miss you buddy. Know you always have a home here. And YOU BETTER STAY IN TOUCH.

PS: Did you like the armadillos? They are from The Au Pair’s Plog (picture blog). He’s got a lot more of them!


10 Responses to Thursday Thirteen: The Farewell To Au Pair Edition

  1. jennfactor says:

    The importance of an incredibly inappropriate sense of humor cannot be overtstated. sigh.

  2. lucy says:

    Filthy au pair, I hardly knew yee. We’re going to miss him terribly too. Crse, you’re such a wonderful person for being the au pair’s island of sanity (can anyone imagine the world for which Crse’s home is an island of sanity, and yet it is true) and for giving him such a sweet send-off.

  3. lucy says:

    Yee? WTF is yee? I meant “ye.”

  4. lucy says:

    Yee? WTF is yee? I meant “ye.”

  5. Dexter Colt says:

    I have a broom closet and I make a mean gruel if you’re au pair is in need of more culturing. I pay a few pence a day and only use the lash in extreme cases…like when wire hangers are used.

  6. gretty says:

    The horrible, jealous part of me is not so sorry to see him go 😉
    The rest of me knows how much you’ll all miss him and therefore will miss him too.

  7. au pair says:

    Oh crse, how I miss you all already!!! And yes Lucy, that was very sweet send off if I do say so myself, but ye knew me a’plenty, kinda lol.

    BTW- this was HYSTERICAL!! I especially love numbers one through thirteen, 😛 Seriously though, this is just one prime example of how you bring out the best in people crse! None of this would have been if you guys weren’t part of it!

    Much love, and I’ll keep you posted!

    oh, and gretty…I knew you were jealous….SIKE!! I really had no idea, sorry! 😛

  8. au pair says:

    ack, sorry to double post, but I hit ctrl+enter on accident (I know you’re thinking how do you accidentally hit two keys at the same time, that’s the fun of being a blond- you should try it out!)

    this also goes to gretty- You’re only jealous because you didn’t get to experience the true awesomeness that is the [sometimes filthy] au pair!

  9. gretty says:

    Au pair – you’re right, I was never worthy of that title – and therein lies my jealousy!

  10. crseum says:

    Jenn- Amen sister
    Lucy- I thought the yee was on purpose. I liked it! And believe it or not I see my own home as an island of sanity yet appreciate the contradiction as well! We are going to miss him like crazy.
    Dexter- this one got away but ill send the next one to you for pre-training.
    Gretty- You were not just an au pair baby you were/are an AUNTIE.
    Au Pair- And number 14. The text today “Thank you so much for telling me about the silent on the elevator thing. It’s so helpful”. That. Was. Poetry. I miss you sunshine.
    Gretty/Au Pair- I think he propositioned you sweetie, what the hell kind of cougar are you woman? You two are tearing me apart. I love you both so much…

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